Friday, 30 August 2019

France 2019 - if you weren't "in" (on the joke) you're "out"


Thursday 8th August & Friday 9th August




You never think the day is going to arrive and then before you know it, you’re chasing around doing all those “last minute” jobs.   Del finished early so we were hitched up and on the road by 13.30 – as my mother would say, “well if we haven’t got it now it’s too late!”

G&T time

We were pitched and sitting in the sun by 15.30 at Black Horse Farm, such a lovely site.   Dinner at The Black Horse pub (just across the road), back and bed by 21.30.  The alarm was set for 03.45 but neither of us slept very well and before we knew it we were getting up and back on the road – Eurotunnel here we come.   However, must tell you about a little funny....

In the car, hitched up and ready to leave the campsite – at 04.30 it’s still very dark.  We started to go and Del realised he had on the wrong glasses, changing said glasses he said “oh oh what’s happened here?”.... “what?” says I..... “the lights have gone off” says Del... “no, you’ve put your sunglasses on!”

'cause that's the kinda guy he is!
We arrived at Eurotunnel and it was heaving; our train was already marked as “proceed to train” so no time for toilet/drink nothing.  Having Daisy on the back we were allowed to jump the long queue but even then we were right at the back of the train with just two cars behind us – goodness knows what happened to all the other “E” boarders.  We’re so used to all this now it really is water off a ducks back.   Hmm... funny I should talk about water and ducks....



OMG!   No sooner than we were clear of the tunnel and joined the A16 the heavens opened and I mean OPENED!!!!!!   It didn’t stop until we were 300 miles down the road and approaching Le Mans rain, wind, thunder, lightning absolutely horrendous.   One time we stopped for fuel only to find once we’d rejoined the motorway that we had no lights on the van, fortunately there was an Aire just up the road where Del was able to get out and jiggle the plug a bit – that would have been scary not having any lights in that weather.

Talking of fuel, Del has most of our holiday money on one of those cards that you can use instead of carrying cash.  It worked fine last year so no reason to believe it wouldn’t this, hmmm..... first petrol station "non".... second petrol station "non"....   Phone call to the company, long story short transferring money back to Del’s bank account in 2-3 days and charging us 50euros for the pleasure – they’ll be hearing from us on our return!!!!!!!!


We were met by Dave once we reached Kathy & Dave’s Camping at La Fosse de Tigne – instant calm, peace, tranquillity; oh we do love this place.   However, we were the only campers on site it seemed very strange but actually after that long drive we just wanted to pitch up and relax.  Dave came over at about 7pm and asked us to join him and Kathy for a drink in their bar, very nice it was too after a long day - a couple of drinks with friends and an early night.   The wind was howling, the van was rocking, the awning was flapping but we were so tired it wasn’t a bother.

Saturday 10th August

We joined Kathy & Dave and some friends of theirs, Pascual and his wife Sylvan, for a lunch time barbeque, great food and wine as always.  After a while our friends Ruth & Steve arrived – well that was the end of our peace & quiet (LOL).  It was so lovely to see them and our friendship was instantly on again.   The rest of the evening was sitting outside until 10.30pm catching up and laughing until our sides ached – what a great start to our holiday.

Sunday 11th August

Such a lazy day today, with only Ruth, Steve and us in the campsite it was so so quiet – although we’re never short of conversation, ranging from Yakult to Donald Trump!   ...we weren’t really talking about Yakult it’s an “in” joke but not one for sharing. What goes in France, stays in France.... The weather had been quite good all day, warm, sunny and then a little cloudy but really quite nice until someone mentioned “let’s cook a barbeque” – what is it with us English, bbq’s and the weather?   Seriously within 5 minutes of getting the bbq out the sky grew black, the rain poured and the wind howled.  Dinner was cooked in the caravan, eaten in the awning and can you believe....yes I know you will... when the last mouthful was popped in, blue sky, sun and beautiful weather.



We were in and out like an Austrian cuckoo clock, but eventually we stayed out until the sun had gone down playing cards for nuts and bolts!



Monday 12th August

Del-boy’s birthday!




The plan was to go too Doux le Fontaine to the market, quick trip to Intermarche for wine then back in time for lunch at Chez Paul, yeah right we didn’t even wake up until nearly 10am - Chez Paul it was.   Chez Paul is what is known in the UK as a ‘transport cafe’ – it’s even on a roundabout.  The food is superb, typical French cooking; starters are a DIY job from the fridge – eggs, avocados, melons, cold meats, salad, pate are some of the goodies on offer.  Then there is a choice of 6 main meals – I had steak & frites, Del chose lamb and flageolet beans; cheese board is the next course, followed by dessert which comes in the form of ice cream (a Cornetto), coffee éclair, tarte.  Wine and cider on the table, coffee after – all of this for 14 euros!



In the evening we went wine tasting with Kathy & Dave – we bought a ‘little’ – would be rude not too, but shock horror they’d run out of our favourite Cremant de Loire!   Jean-Marie promises to find us another supplier before we leave.    Back at camp we played dominos with Ruth & Steve, it took us about three turns to actually get the rules.

Our awning in the evening


Tuesday 13th August

The weather has been very mixed while we’ve been here, quite windy but warm, then a sudden shower followed by glorious sunshine.   We had a lovely bbq of pork kebabs followed by a really scrummy rice pudding cooked by Kathy – how did she know it was one of my favourite puddings????  Then in the evening Pascual & Sylvan (friend’s of K&D) joined us all for a game of baules ‘France vs England’ – us Brits like to think of it as a "learning curve" ......6-0.......to France......

France vs England


Wednesday 14th August



All the times we've been to this part of France we'd never been to Vihiers, so we thought we'd go on market day.  Not much and what was there was VERY expensive.  So instead we sat outside the local tabac, had coffee before having a look around the church.   Hurray the third coule of the 'gang' had arrived - Steve & Bev.  Baules it was despite the weather being windy and cool.



Thursday 15th August

The weather is still a bit grot, windy and cool with heavy clouds although not raining.   We decided we needed to get off camp and do something.  Time for a chateau I think, quick google and we found Chateau Breze.  Steve  & Ruth came along too and it was rather nice.  Totally different to any other chateau we’ve been too, yes there was some nice rooms to see but the actually building and the dry moat was amazing.   The moat is 90ft deep and you can walk down through the carved out tunnels into the moat itself.  Around the side of the moat they had carved out their servants’ rooms e.g. the bakery, the brewery etc.   There was a lot of walking up and down and some steep slopes but we did it and rewarded ourselves with an ice cream at the end of it all.   Back to camp where after dinner we sat in the awning playing cards for a couple of hours.

Chateau Breze

The Dry Moat, where the servants lived



The Camping Clowns
Those that must be obeyed - my mate Ruthy & me


Friday 16th August

Del and I laid in this morning and didn’t have breakfast until about 11am when Kathy came over and said that a Chinese meal was to be had if we wanted, leaving around 12 noon!   Oh well, who can turn down a Chinese?   We all went, Steve & Ruth with us and Steve & Bev with Kathy & Dave, the food is superb and very reasonable at 13.50 euros per head.   At the end of the meal we were offered Saki but each of us turned it down except Kathy who was surprised by a small cup of the drink.  Not wishing to upset her host she tried it, then offered me some – jeez it REALLY is disgusting!  Talking of disgusting – so was the picture at the bottom of the small saki cup – a naked man with a rather large **@%(^!   The afternoon saw us sleeping in the sun as it had finally decided to appear, it was still windy but rather nice.  Back to cards this evening, with Ruth introducing a new game to us – good fun!


Saturday 17th/Sunday 18th

Well this trip is slowly becoming the FFS Trip!   Jeez the bloody rain and wind was unbelievable; it’s wonderful being surrounded by fields but god when that wind blows it sure does come from all angles.   The four of us were so miserable on Saturday we could even be heard to say “I’ve got nothing to do” like sulky kids, so of course, when in France with “nothing to do” what best to do but go to the supermarket!  We all needed some bits and the car needed fuel so it was Super U in Vihiers.   Cards again this evening.  I hope things improve or this is going to be one of the most boring blogs I’ve written.

So Sunday arrived to pouring rain all night, hammering its tunes on the roof from about 1am until about 1pm!   BUT THEN!  All of a sudden the wind stopped howling, the rain stopped and there was this big yellow thing floating about in a rather pretty shade of blue.  Out came the chairs, Ruth and I washed and spun (yes, she has a spin dryer in her moho) some of the dirty washing, Dave lit the barbeque and we were all sat around the marquee eating our food and discussing baules, fish & chips and why not to put domestos in your toilet before you go to bed – sorry another “in” joke that will remain “in” the memories of my fellow campers!

Baules tonight in the evening sun – I think I’m finally getting the gist of it! 

Finally, a nice view out of the window
 

Monday 19th August 

This really has been a lazy holiday with Del and I not waking up until 9.30(ish) each morning.  Despite having breakfast, a trip to Chez Paul was the plan for the day and the rest of the day was spent lazing and snoozing in the Orchard.

Tuesday 20th August 

During one of our numerous pre-holiday emails with Ruth & Steve they mentioned that they’d like to go to I’le de Machine in Nantes.   We went two years ago when the boys (Robbie & Fred) were with us, we loved it so much it really wasn’t a discussion to be had - “YES!” We didn’t arrive in Nantes until nearly lunch time and the queues were quite long.  In hindsight we should have gone and got a baguette before queuing, because when we’d seen the machines nowhere was open for lunch, so a huge ice cream it was!   We didn’t get to ride the elephant this time as the earliest we could book was 18.45.   We enjoyed going a second time and there were some new machines to see, I think Ruth & Steve enjoyed it.    Once back at camp we had been joined by some new campers Rachel & Colin from Manchester, they were of course, warmly welcomed into the “gang”.


Wednesday 21st August

Del and I decided to go into Saumur for the day.   We had a croque monsieur in a small bistro in the back streets and then went for a lovely walk along the riverbank.   Saumur is beautiful, there’s some lovely little shops, including one we found where everything was made from cork, but once again we were shocked at how expensive everything had become e.g. 30 euros for a t-shirt which is the equivalent of £30.  There were more new campers when we arrived back Bob & Mrs. Bob (I have no idea what her name was as she kept herself to herself), they were staying for just one night.





Thursday 22nd August

The weather is hot, hot, hot which is wonderful considering it was so awful last week.   It was another day to stay in the Orchard, a delicious barbeque lunch in Kathy & Dave’s awning followed by baules with our fellow campers and late night hysterics discussing turkey necks (another “in” joke)

Friday 23rd August

There was a vote of confidence for another visit to Chez Paul, this time we took along Rachel & Colin and introduced them to the wonderful food they serve.   In the evening there was a French/English Quiz night in the village, we made up 2 teams for 4 Bev & Steve/Rachel & Colin, Ruth & Steve/Del & I.  The questions were first read out in French and then in English – some of the questions were unbelievable “where can you find a cenote?” – answers ranged from The Vatican to the Pyramids!  The answer is “an underground water pit” – we did come 8th so not a shabby effort.

The walk back to the Orchard was a totally different story....   the distance between the two is 5-10 minute walk in the daylight, but as I’ve said before La Fosse de Tigne is a very small village in the midde of nowhere and the only light to lead our way back was the stars.   It was pitch black but Del having consumed a bottle of wine (it is very weak wine) led the way like a commander leading his troops.  Ruth and I clung to each other – despite it being night time there were a LOT of animals around at that time of night!

Saturday 24th August– our last day L and what will be always remembered as “Stinging Steve & The Hornets”.  

Leaving this place gets harder and harder each year, the weather this past week has been simply wonderful, beautiful sunsets, fabulous company and just peace and quiet.   We had stayed the extra night because we were going to the moules and frites in Martigne Briand but as we were the only campers going we decided to stay behind.    The evening was spent with the 8 of us sitting under the apple trees telling stories and laughing so hard – how will any of us survive Del’s story of Jonnie Condom & The Lubricators (aka Jonnie & The Lubes), Peter & the Test Tube Babies and even Smeggy & the Cheezy Bits. 

Around 10.30pm Del went and got some lights so we could see each other, Colin fetched some lovely candles and night lights.   Now, we’d heard the hornets buzzing around in the apple trees but they weren’t bothering us so we continued.  However, when the aromatic candle arrived the hornets went crazy and began swarming around Ruth & Steve’s moho (they had their porch light on), Steve went in to turn off the light and they followed him in the van, poor Ruth had one fly up her dress (it didn’t sting her thank goodness), it was really quite scary.  We all ran off to our vans scared they would follow us, fortunately we had kept the fly screen closed on Daisy and all the windows covered by their screens.   There was just one that got in when Del tried to close the hickey window but it flew out quite quickly once we turned the lights out.   Our poor fly squatter has taken a beating this holiday, I think we may need to replace it for next year as there’s more fly than squat left.


Sunday 25th August – going home day – yah boo hiss!   

Saying goodbye to our friends was so hard this year, Ruth & Steve left first, they had another few days in France before returning home.   Colin & Rachel were leaving the next day and Bev & Steve not until the middle of the week.   Del and I took our time packing up, praying that the Lottery God would send us an email saying we’d won and we didn’t need to leave, but before long it was all done and we set out on the long journey home.  The temperature in the car was reading 36 degrees and the journey seemed to go on forever.   We had in the morning phoned Eurotunnel to see if we could get an earlier train but they were fully booked – this was quite obvious when we got to Calais and saw the long lines of traffic waiting to board their trains.  There had been a breakdown in one of the tunnels causing long delays, but by the time our allotted time came they were pretty much on time – Eurotunnel really is a very slick operation.

Once we were back in Blighty we headed straight for Gatwick where we had booked a late arrival’s pitch arriving in Crawley at 2.30am, and before we knew it the first flight of the day was resonating in our ears.  It was all over for another year. 

It really was a wonderful holiday, thanks to all our friends Ruthy & Steve, Bev & Steve, Colin & Rachel, Kathy & Dave and of course, my OH Del.   There really is only one way to say goodbye/farewell to La Fosse and that is with a picture of one of the glorious sunsets.


Roll on 2020!





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